Key points::
The largest study of women’s orgasms to date collected data from 27,931 women.
Nearly half of the sample (47%) reported reaching orgasm more frequently when alone vs. when with a partner.
The most common reasons for orgasming alone or with a partner related to relational factors, not anatomy.
Partnered orgasms, but not solo orgasms, were associated with overall sexual satisfaction.
Men will often take it personally if a woman doesn’t orgasm during partnered sex. Which in turn puts pressure on the woman to perform. Because even a woman’s orgasm is a reflection of her male partner and his ego instead of being something for her.
It’s clear you both didn’t understand the point of what the study was trying to point out. Especially because men orgasm 95% of the time during partnered sex. And having said study done looking at women doesn’t mean that men don’t ever find themselves in similar positions.
I mean, I can read and understand the article.
I’m just commenting on others thing or specifics elements of it, trying to clarify what seems to be two people talking past each other.
The study… itself… made many points.
I’m not challenging any of them, I’m just commenting on the bits I personally found most interesting, given that you’d already well covered the main jist of it in your comments, that already existed, when I made my comment.
Anyway, in general, I think its something of a tragedy when two people are with each other, and one or both of them feels like they have to put on a performance, as opposed to just actually being honest with each other.
Ideally, they’d both trust and communicate with each other well enough that that would not be a factor… as the study notes, a huge factor for women that do get there more often with partners than by themselves, is basically that they trust, feel safe, and communicate well with their partner in the bedroom
I guess perhaps I am a bit of an odd duck in that I am a guy who has been in the situation of … my female partner expected me to orgasm, repeatedly expressed concern and worry and even sadness that I hadn’t yet… and despite both our efforts toward that for over an hour… with an otherwise uh, capable and excited member… it just wasn’t happening.
So I’ve been in that 5%, at least a couple of times.
From my point of view, yeah I feel like I did experience a bit of that same dynamic you describe, but sex inverted.
Its just… strange, basically, seemingly paradoxical, but not actually… its like you say, but again sex inverted; I felt like I was letting her down, like my climax was a reflection of her in some way, something I owed to her, frustrated with myself a bit.
But, perhaps because I am a guy, perhaps because I am me, I didn’t consider ‘faking it’. So, that part of it was certainly different.
… and if you can’t tell, well, I’m still hesitant to just directly talk about it. Because I still feel somewhat guilty and ashamed by this, even though I know that… that doesn’t really make any sense.
She had a uh, peakingly good time! … but it would have been better, for her, if I also had had the same.