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Cake day: January 8th, 2024

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  • Much easier said than done. Some people have a difficult time accepting that their children are adults with different opinions. My Dad still sees me as the little boy he raised, sometimes that’s nice and I treasure it. Sometimes it’s still the most frustrating thing in the world. I’m fortunate that my parents haven’t fallen down the MAGA pipeline but they’re definitely more conservative than they were 5 years ago. I couldn’t educate my Dad on anything, he just doesn’t see me that way. Mind you I don’t have to, I’m fortunate.

    My point being, for some people their relationship with their parents will never go both ways but that’s okay. They’re your parents and it’s one of the relationships that rarely is symmetrical. My Dad is my father, I’m his son, and I’ve learned to accept the relationship we have (which is pretty good) rather than get upset about the few problematic beliefs he holds. For people who are not as fortunate as me, zero contact might be the answer. Sometimes it’s okay to accept things that aren’t perfect.




  • InputZero@lemmy.worldtoNo Stupid Questions@lemmy.world*Permanently Deleted*
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    3 months ago

    Okay young one, we have a few things to get through.

    First, you should feel whatever you do feel. It’s not as embarrassing to have your parents help you than you might think. You’re in your early 20s, which means most of your life experience comes from when you were a child and embarrassing parents were a social death sentence. You’re an adult now and to a lot of older adults stuff like that becomes insignificant compared to other things. That said if you feel embarrassed, you feel embarrassed, there is no should to feelings.

    Two, I suggest you tell your Dad that you appreciate what he’s trying to do, and that you’ll go on the date (because I think you should). You need to tell him that doing this without keeping you in the loop made you feel uncomfortable. He’s trying to help and it comes from a good place but the execution was a little off.

    If he doesn’t listen or it still feels wrong you have to tell him that too and ask him to stop. Still I suggest you try it out.

    Third, go easy on yourself. Finding a partner is not easy, and at your age you’re going to make mistakes, big ones but that’s okay. That’s what living is. Just make sure you don’t an STI or you or someone else pregnant. Unless future you is trying to have a kid, in which case good luck!