LustyArgonian

No, education gives you a good faith foundation so your neural connections are well groomed and not messy. Arguing in good faith is the basis for what we consider a fact is, and our sciences and legal systems. It’s the basis of progress. It also stops you from being bamboozled, even by yourself, and prevents delusional thinking.

And in terms of IQ, yes, remembering facts DOES make an IQ score go up significantly.

Curiosity and openmindedness are related to intelligence, along with resiliency.

Hope you are doing ok

It isn’t a human connection.

They are mourning the loss of having a tool reflect their deepest psychological desires back at them.

There is no outside feature on men that cam predict dick size, including height.

When in middle school, the reason height and dick size are related is due to testosterone at that age and who is developing sooner, it isn’t per se an indication of actual adult dick size. You were just observing the influence of testosterone and puberty.

I have met several gigantic dicks, some on short men. I have met several very tall men with tiny dicks. There is no way to know someone’s dick size until you look at their dick.

Alcoholism will ruin your ability to get hard and your apparently one redeeming quality so you may want to get that in check or learn how to eat mad pussy

You can get hormones by eating gonads (eg ovaries, uterus, testes), that’s part of how those meds are made. So it won’t stop people from getting them, it just means their doses will be unpredictable.

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Singing also helps with this too, idk if you enjoy that but even humming works.

I don’t really expect anything from you any which way, I mean that nicely, no worries. Take care

There’s always tomorrow. It’s a good sign you don’t want to be like the person who hurt you and already differentiates you from them as a parent. You are already doing better than your mom by thinking that.

That “worms” feeling and the staying up late is because your brain is using histamine and adrenaline (plus other stuff) to make a lot of neural connections that were already close by. It will mildly restrict blood flow from smaller capillaries too. You can keep that busy or more switched off mentally by exercising and especially doing something that moves your eyes and the muscles under your eyes, eg face yoga. That gets the circulation going back into the small capillaries and helps you reset biochemically. Even just flexing your undereyes (like John Wayne squints) will encourage blood flow in your face and help.

It is a lot of work and pain now, but it is absolutely worth it to see through the bullshit and heal yourself. I am a happier person for it 1000%. It’s worth it to be brave but go slow and don’t push it. Take breaks.

Therapists can be hit or miss (a bad one is worse than no therapist), but you can find one that specializes in BPD that can help guide you (not that you per se have it, but they work with it a lot and can help you understand it really well). BPD, even residual fleas from parents, is VERY treatable with dialectal behavior therapy and talk therapy as long as the person wants to learn and the therapist is adequate (some aren’t).

To be honest, opening this knowledge up can be overwhelming and can take years. Take your time with it. I still get new memories of abuse that my brain had sort of locked away, it gets easier to assimilate over time though once you have a good foundation/framework for the trauma. The 2 best things for you to remember, is that 1) your mom’s traits are hers, not automatically yours or every mom’s or every woman’s, because she has her own mental illness that is just a “her” thing and 2) good rolemodels you had as a kid besides her, even teachers or therapists or TV personalities

He has been sexually abused by her, perhaps covertly. There is enough in what you described that if I was a mandated reporter, I’d be making a call. From what I know of CSA, he has multiple flags and signs of being sexually abused (nearly every sentence you wrote, actually). Kids don’t run around with their genitals put like that, chasing people, unless they were abused. Literally every developmentally delayed perskn I’ve known to do that ended up being sexually abused. Did he bed wet or soil his bedding at night as well, well into older age, eg middle school age, when he shouldn’t have been doing that?

Highly recommend, when you feel okay to do so, to look up emotional incest first, and parentification/adultification. That will explain how your mother has been grooming your brother to be her stand-in husband. The reason she didn’t want him to go to school is because a husband her age wouldn’t go to school (they are also full of mandated reporters - did she also avoid taking him to doctors and dentists?).

It sounds like your mom also had an emotionally incestuous relationship with you as well, so reading that material can be extremely “triggering” for you. My sincere condolences, it is very traumatizing. Reading about it can bring up old memories as your brain tries to organize old memories with this new information. Often people get tired, agitated, or even regress in age. Give yourself plenty of time to mentally adjust and read and lots of breaks outside walking around, ideally in nature, w eyeballs moving around and looking up at trees or clouds. OR you can try to play a game like Tetris afterwards (Tetris is specifically studied as being helpful for PTSD/trauma).

I will also rec the book The Borderline Mother, I’m not sure this applies to her at all, but my guess is that it does

https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbyborderlines/comments/1gle1x1/my_summary_of_understanding_the_borderline_mother/

And if it does, also recommend the book Stop Caretaking the Borderline or Narcissist. Likely you already do much of this which is why you’re the “black sheep” (aka you dont give her supply).

Yes, me personally, I used to play competitive World of Warcraft. Did timed challenge mode dungeons for realm’s best at end of MoP too.

Used to game with him back in MoP. Sad to see this is where he ended up.

No Planned Parenthood is already not able to take Medicaid/Medicare in some places

People die in heat and live in their cars.

It’s just called dry camping, some people don’t have a choice.

I’m emphasizing that even if she had left them.in her home for that long, it is wrong. Obviously it is worse because of the car

Dry camping is just a term for sleeping in your car. It isn’t literally camping per se but it can be.

You have to use an AC when it’s hot out or you’ll die.

Using a clothes dryer has a bigger impact than a hybrid car running AC.

If they have a hybrid, the engine doesn’t idle all night, only intermittently to charge the battery.

It is more ethical and better for the environment to leave a hybrid running all night (engine only kicking on every so often) than a typical home or apartment which has a much bigger daily carbon impact. A hybrid isn’t the same as a normal idling car.

People die in heat and live in their cars. Do you go without air conditioning when it’s over 100 degrees out? No, because you don’t want to die of heatstroke, right? So why is your indoor climate control more justified?

And yeah car exhaust is bad for everyone, I agree, including the person in the idling car.

If they have a hybrid, it is more ethical and better for the environment to leave it running all night (engine only kicking on every so often) than a typical home or apartment which has a much bigger daily carbon impact.

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And she had a hybrid vehicle btw