If you install Linux first, Windows will see a grub partition on install and go “Oh, let me use this too” disregarding it’s for an entirely different OS. Then when grub is updated by Windows it goes “What’s all this crap, nah, we don’t need any of this” and then your Linux distro can’t be booted.

I’ve dual booted for years, never had an issue because I installed Windows first.

had a constant melodramatic after-school special vibe in which characters were constantly stopping in the middle of an emergency to talk about their feelings and kumbaya-cry it out

Nail on the head.