• 1 Post
  • 6 Comments
Joined 1 month ago
Cake day: September 27th, 2025
  • Panamania@sh.itjust.worksOPtoCasual Conversation@piefed.social•Hello there . . .English
    1·
    27 days ago

    Just dealing with our stupid reality on the daily.

    Felt that. Between being not exactly straight, wildly neurodivergent, and a rainbow soup of ethnicities, my little friend group has had more than a few “ohh fuck” moments lately.

    It was a really great time, literally flying home right now feeling sad that it’s over. Felt really great reconnecting with my people and spending time both not worrying about anything and commiserating over the bullshit we’ve all been going through. Does drunkenly eating bananas in the hot tub count as wild?

  • Panamania@sh.itjust.worksOPtoCasual Conversation@piefed.social•Hello there . . .English
    1·
    1 month ago

    If it makes you feel any better, I’m pretty sure I stole it from reddit once upon a time ago.

    Actually, not half bad for once. About to fly out for my homies bachelor party and see all my friends I’ve barely talked to for the last 6 months. Dreading come back afterwards, but I’ll take the win for now.

    How about you, aside from having a thing for naughty nuns?

  • Panamania@sh.itjust.worksOPtoCasual Conversation@piefed.social•Hello there . . .English
    3·
    1 month ago

    Sorry for slow reply, your comment warranted more of a response than my work schedule would allow. I was mostly joking, I know I’m a poor bitch and I’m proud of it (though I wouldn’t mind having a least a couple more $).

    It’s not so much that I get tired living in my own mind, its more just incredibly frustrating having no option to share anything even if I want/ need to. I’m also realizing that I just can’t see my own negative patterns and errors starting before it’s too late without someone else physically in my space saying “hey dumbass, your doing it again”.

    It was getting late and I was tiredly losing my marbles one by one, mostly hoping someone would get a chuckle or two. But I hadn’t considered what I was really doing from that perspective, might have sit with that one a while, thanks a lot.

    I’d like to give Alien: Earth a shot, kinda waiting for my parents to rotate around to the next streaming service, lol. I am required by sacred law to wait for my friend to watch the next season of The Wonderfully Amazing Weird World of Gumball. I too enjoy the bad-bad-good movies, but I feel like nothing has qualified for a while. Last new thing I watched was Superman, but that was just straight up good-good.

    This is this the part that got me. It’s been years since I last remember feeling any lasting joy or excitement. I know intellectually a big part of it is the depression robbing my memories, but its still hard to fight the apathetic panic of watching my personal hard-drive become corrupted. A big reason for moving was actually because we were both needing a way to get the gears moving on life again, and it worked for a while, but maybe it was just because I had a goal to focus on and someone else to be responsible for. Now that I’ve nothing other than myself to worry about, it is harder than ever to give a fuck about anything. I almost had the front end of my car deleted the other day and my only reaction was to instinctively hit the brakes before the other driver remembered that situational awareness is a prerequisite skill to driving. It took a solid 20 minutes to even register that any emotions would have been highly appropriate in that situation, and by that point the entire event was about as interesting as an OSHA training video. They say if we just go to therapy and make new friends that we will get better, but that just feels like hollow advice without some tangible way to achieve these things.

    We (I) moved from southern California to the middle of Oregon. On paper, this place check all my boxes, but so far nothing has really turned out as I expected.