I am sorry to say I think all women have experience with this. For me, I mostly just was not as traumatized as I’d expect someone to be, it would be more traumatic to bring it up, so I just moved on. Only if someone asks do I disclose it. If it was someone who later became powerful I might feel different though, right? Might feel like if he did that to me, he doubtless hurt others, and it might possibly do some good.

I grew up here in Florida without air conditioning until I was about 25.

Really just learned to be still, that helps. Keep the windows open at night if it cools off at night.

Stay in the shade, if there is a breeze it is not bad. Fans, fans, fans. Carry a parasol if possible . Shade helps so much.

And I wait for the rainy season, ours is at the same time of year yours is. Love that time, every day it gets hot but then in the afternoon the rain comes.

ETA I think India has this covered already but stay away from synthetic fabric and cotton. Linen or silk are best, and oddly, light merino wool in a loose fit is also so good in the hot weather.

I don’t use either of those, generally. Pintos make the best chili, for veg or beef chili.

But if making a chili with chicken, black beans are the best.

You won’t wreck it, it’s chili. Taste and adjust till you like it.

How long have you had these beans, that they are expiring? Don’t they last for years?

Sometimes I do it before, not after, because UTI. Hands are dirtier than any other part of you, generally speaking. Usually after, but it’s just an opportunity to wash my hands in general - I don’t really think touching toilet paper to my pussy is going to get my hands dirty. So yeah, I wash my hands because it’s a convenient time to do that.

No, not normal. If you enjoy it, something is wrong. If you just aren’t upset by it, but care, you might make a good emergency room doctor.

How do you feel if it’s someone you care about, or yourself?

Not where I live. “Nice” in our office for men is a button-up tucked into actual pants, and good shoes. Maybe a sweater or blazer if it’s cold (not often here) Just looking put together. Some guys wear that everyday, others are more casual.

Women gave up formal office wear completely because that involves heels and pantyhose. For “Nice” we have a similar outfit as the guys, or a dress or skirt & top combo. Some women dress like that everyday in our office but just like with the men, most of us do not. I wear jeans and a good T-shirt or button-up or a light sweater.

I mean, you could pick it up with your foot without bending down, right?

My mom worked as a university professor, then advisor, and what she said about college was “it just shows a prospective employer that you can follow rules and commit to doing something for a few years and follow through on it. That’s why they want the degree. Also cuts down on applicants, fewer to sort through.”

So, from someone on the inside, she didn’t think the main reason was education, in terms of specific jobs. I know in accounting I don’t use so much of what I learned and that’s a pretty specific degree. Anyone with a mind for numbers & systems could be trained on the job to do what I do.

But are none of the streets long enough to end up with a 1867, or whatever?

I am not good with left and right, mostly orient myself in the world using north, south, east, west and it is oddly disorienting to be on the diagonal road, my mind keeps wanting to think of it as a north-south road. Until I can FEEL it I keep saying it. The corners of the house are the compass points. My work office right now also is set diagonally like that!

May I ask a question about German addresses? Here, they go up and up as you move out from the center of town - we have a zero/zero, so to speak, at one corner, and if you live at 100 N, you are one block north of center. So if you are 100 blocks north of center you live at 10000. I lived at 1500 E on 15th St I’d be 15 blocks away in two directions from that central point.

Our German addresses are always like 6, never a big number. How?

Our house is on a slanty road and I’ve never lived on one before, my mind rejects it. The CORNERS of the house point in cardinal directions. It’s because we are near a river, some of the streets in my neighborhood follow its course, which right here runs southwest.

I just have to stop and think every time. Because I have only stayed on N-S or E-W roads my mind thinks our walls ought to be along those lines. I have to point at the corner and say NORTH out loud more often than you’d think.

I am older, and have not found any of that to be true. As a lady, more makes more; more sex makes sex feel better and it’s easier to get off, and sexual frustration does not make me creative at all, just distracted and frustrated.

There is also physical benefit to sex for older women, I don’t know if it’s the same for younger, but certainly after menopause sex prevents vaginal atrophy and prolapse of internal organs, it’s sort of a use it or lose it situation. Penetration and orgasms are good for muscle tone, apparently. Beyond the obvious benefits of pleasure and relationship building.

Are you a lady? I work in an office at a sports company (so sporty casual is common) and there are several women here who wear dresses and skirts not pants, several more who switch back & forth. Not me - pants feel much more secure to me - but it’s nothing anyone really notices.

A man wearing skirts we would notice for awhile, not care but notice; if you are customer facing then you might encounter that surprise over and over, if not, I don’t think it will be a big deal.

Not religious but my mom was Methodist and open-minded. Basically she said the Bible was a document from a different time, and the most important commandments were to love your neighbor and take care of the least of us.

The behavioral rules she just thought relics of an earlier time, said many had been solved with science (ok to eat pork, be gay, whatever).

My grandma was Catholic and she just basically wasn’t evangelical, right? So sure, maybe we were going to hell but that was between us & God, nothing to do with her. On homosexuality she (like others I’ve talked to) said, yeah of course gay people were made that way by God, that was their cross to bear, they had to be celibate. “So do nuns and monks and priests, some people are not supposed to have sex, it’s always been that way.”

https://sdhc.nutrislice.com/menu/high-schools/lunch-2/2026-03-24?isRunningInMobileApp=true

Just coffee. I would eat a late breakfast one day, then stop eating, coffee (no calories) the next morning and then nothing until supper, usually around 8pm.

Yes the LDL went back up. I know it was related to the fasting and not weight loss - I am not fat and maintained calories overall to keep my weight stable. I had been sort of stumped, like you are. Obviously if someone is overweight and loses weight that will have benefits, there wasn’t a lot of research on people of normal weight fasting and not reducing. I got the one measurable benefit, but no improvements I could feel in any way, and the headaches were pretty bad.

ETA - short fast doesn’t need careful refeed. I just made a regular supper to break those fasts. No problems, and in general digestion has never been a weakness for me.

I used to do 36 hours a week, as an experiment. Not for weight loss. Maintained my weight.

Results: lower LDL cholesterol. Sharply lower. Blood pressure lower only while fasting.

Side effects: migraines. I tried to arrange it so there was not so much time fasting before sleeping but would usually wake up with a migraine.

Never fasted more than 2 days voluntarily.

What the actual fuck? NO. Kids who are little are little kids, they are all potential, you can be somewhat disappointed in their behavior occasionally but not them. Grown kids are grownups with their own lives, they can disappoint themselves I guess but not me, and if they somehow managed it I still would not say that, they don’t exist to satisfy me, that’s not the point of having kids. Had kids to have a family and to grow some independent adults so they could have lives of their own.

A dainty little fork, for most cakes. I make easy cakes not fancy cakes though. Ricotta cake, yogurt cake, pineapple upside down cake. Not so fluffy, more springy. Sort of a cornbread recipe, modified to make different cakes. So often it’s reasonable to cut a wedge and just eat it without a utensil.