@flicker

flicker@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 6 minutes ago

Oh and I’m not not a nudist because of prude things. I run chilly so if I don’t have clothes on, it’s because I’m uncomfortably hot. Just a quick of my biology- I come in two settings, blankets and hoodies, or soaked in sweat.

I’m not anemic anymore either so 🤷

flicker@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 9 minutes ago

I’m not really planning on pushing the issue, for all I know Janet got cold feet and is using him as an excuse

I was actually going to point this out. I’m glad you anticipated it.

But also I want to add that I’m a woman in a relationship with a man who would support me doing whatever I want in life, and if I wanted to go on a trip to a nudist place and he didn’t, I wouldn’t want to go. Not only because I like spending time with him most of all people, but also because, while I don’t imagine I’d need to defend myself at such a location, I prefer to have him around in case I ever feel the need for violence. He keeps my hands clean quite nicely.

But it’s mostly the “he’s my favorite person so if enjoy doing something more if he were there” thing.

The funny thing about this is, my partner is a nudist, and I’m not. I asked him if he would want to go to a nudist resort if I wanted to say no, and he said he’d rather spend time with me at home than go somewhere to be nude (and he doesn’t wear anything at home anyway).

flicker@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 10 hours ago

The best moment in my life (please do not take this as advice because it is strongly not) involved recreational drugs and the reason it was the best was because I experienced a shift in perspective that had long-lived impacts on the rest of my life.

I will not be taking questions or responding to guesses. I won’t say “don’t do drugs” because I’m not a hypocrite, but I will say, be smart, be careful, be wise, look to your elders.

The second-best was when I played minigolf with my boyfriend on a 3 day weekend. I smile every time I think about it.

flicker@lemmy.dbzer0.com · edit-2 7 days ago

This is less for the hardware portion and more for the human element;

Figure out what you want your instance to be about and be very clear about it. Maybe write up your rules and have someone friendly with experience go over it with a rules-lawyer vibe, because a lot of the unfun parts of running anything revolve around a tiny segment of the population who will test you.

I have a lot of experience with this if you need assistance, and I know there are others here who do as well.

Remember, being clear about what you stand for and what you want your instance to stand for isn’t just a benefit for you, it also helps let users know whether they agree with you or not, as there’s always another server they can join or post on if they prefer.

ETA; if you’re open to it, I also have a lot of friends who love going over rules with a fine-tooth comb and enjoy helping people, so I could share it with them, too. You can also post openly on Lemmy somewhere and invite discussion. Remember, what you want most is to create the specific space you want. The more specific, the better. And that excluding people isn’t always bad! Safe spaces are necessary.