What the actual fuck.

  • Aganim@lemmy.world
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    3 days ago

    Don’t know who he is supposed to be, but if you think your balls are big enough that you feel the need to use them as your online handle: please get the boys checked for testicular cancer.

  • bobbyguy@lemmy.world
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    3 days ago

    honestly lets find his plates and get him five more medals for his bravery, or one hell of a memorial service

    (jokes aside i do not intend to harm anyone in any way)

    i guess

  • Fredselfish@lemmy.world
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    5 days ago

    I don’t believe any of the stories coming out of this administration about this incident. If true he started it and deserved the ass beating. Matter of fact he deserves worse then a ass beating. He should be hung.

  • carrylex@lemmy.world
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    4 days ago

    Todays episode of USA is wild:

    Two weeks after 19-year-old Edward Coristine was viciously assaulted during a carjacking in Washington D.C., the White House says it would consider giving the administration official a Presidential Medal of Freedom for his bravery.

    A 15-year-old girl and 15-year-old boy were subsequently arrested and remain in juvenile jail as the investigation continues.

    Nice plot twist by the writers 10/10. Excited for the next episodes of the series.

    • ameancow@lemmy.world
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      4 days ago

      The real horror is that we’re never going back to a non-spectacle government or media state.

      This is how it will be forever until something radically changes the world or we all collectively move onto other interests and stop clicking on these stories.

  • ArmchairAce1944@discuss.online
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    3 days ago

    Getting a medal for being a victim of a crime is… dumb. I was a victim of theft, hit and run, stalking, assault, and more. Where is my medal?

  • ToadOfHypnosis@lemmy.world
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    4 days ago

    Very convenient that Trump‘s justifying martial law with this DOGE guys “attack.” About as convenient as Trump’s failed “assassination” attempt.

  • BaroqueInMind@piefed.social
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    5 days ago

    Imagine if the bullet was just two inches to the right, what kind of utopia we would be living in right now.

    • TheLeadenSea@sh.itjust.works
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      4 days ago

      Someone just as bad would have replaced him. The problem isn’t him specifically, it’s all the people who voted for him.

      • Uli@sopuli.xyz
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        4 days ago

        Yep, the problem would be worse because he would be a martyr and out of the news enough that his crimes would fade away into history. And a different fascist would lead that group. At least this way, there is some chance a few more people will finally understand he is a lying thieving scumbag pedophile rapist with no intention of ever helping anyone other than himself.

      • Lucidlethargy@sh.itjust.works
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        4 days ago

        Yeah, I wonder sometimes if this is the best case scenario… He’s a genuine idiot that frequently bites the hands that feed. He’s the worst person to lead the GOP.

    • Smoogs@lemmy.world
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      5 days ago

      ….you say that as if it wasn’t staged or that there was a bullet to begin with.

  • BigMacHole@sopuli.xyz
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    5 days ago

    Teenagers beat up Government Staffer BIG BALLS and now BIG BALLS is going to Receive the Highest Presidential Medal for getting BEAT UP by Kids! THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER!