No earthly being could’ve crafted that thing with such total disregard for comfort and human anatomy. It’s giving Area 51 Home Goods Collection – Model Zeta Reticuli.
I have slept on it once and I felt shitty whole day after. It think it isn’t calibrated for human neuroelectric frequencies but it boosts my WiFi signal so hey.
You put your hands on your pillow?
Hands go under the pillow. Where do you put your tentacles?
They just kinda lay besides me. Just wherever there happens to be room to leave them
That’s an insanely personal question! Only my wife gets to see my testicles.
Silly you, they said spectacles, not testicles