I cook at home because of restaurant prices and tip culture. Driving everywhere sucks. Everything feels miles away so good luck walking.

  • ameancow@lemmy.world
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    2 hours ago

    100% this, you shouldn’t even have expectations, the term “flirting” shouldn’t be in your mental language, you should approach socializing in a different way instead of labeling interactions.

    “That person is nice, fun and attractive, I want to say something that will make them feel good, because they deserve it” is a far better approach than “What magic flirt-words can I say that will make them horny for me.

    (People can tell the difference too.)

    • captainlezbian@lemmy.world
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      1 hour ago

      Idk I find intentionality valuable in flirting, it’s just that my intent is to flirt and if it goes from there well then that’s fun. A sly smile with the compliment, then paying attention to see the tone of her response… it’s a game and it’s in some ways unique compared to telling a stranger I like their outfit (which I also do non flirtatiously).

      “What can I say to make them like me” is the far more juvenile framing. It’s one I’ve seen especially beginners fall into. Instead framing flirtation as a (metaphorical) playful whisper of interest. It should be like a scent you wear: light, discretionarily used, inviting, and yourself. You’re not casting a spell to make them like you, you’re simply inviting them to come and see what could happen if they’re interested.

      But all that is more the intermediate level. The only real secret is that people like spending time with people with whom they enjoy the time they spend with.