I tried making a Reddit account and it asked me to build karma before I could ask on any of the relevant subs so I’m posting here.

I can personally say that if anything goes up there, it hurts, and not in a good way. It does not feel pleasurable at all. It feels kind of like placing a finger on an open sore and pushing down.

Also, if you’re being examined, they tell you to take deep breaths, as if they know that anything going up is going to be painful. If sex is supposed to be pleasurable and enjoyable, why would doctors tell you to brace for impact, so to speak?

Lastly, women often scream during sex. It’s often said they’re screaming out of pleasure and not pain. But there are a lot of things I find extremely pleasurable, but I don’t scream while I do them.

Is it just one of those things that is painful but we’re conditioned into believing the pain is actually pleasure and I must have inconsistent pain tolerance and I am making a big deal out of this?

  • Scratch@sh.itjust.worksEnglish
    16·
    23 hours ago

    The expectation of pain is a huge factor for my partner, she has to be TOTALLY RELAXED to enjoy anything.

    And this developed after us being together for like 10 years. We had super fun, impromptu sex whenever, and then that started to go away.

    Point is, expectations of pain can make sex painful. So OP has a hill to climb to get to easy, comfortable sex.