I tried making a Reddit account and it asked me to build karma before I could ask on any of the relevant subs so I’m posting here.

I can personally say that if anything goes up there, it hurts, and not in a good way. It does not feel pleasurable at all. It feels kind of like placing a finger on an open sore and pushing down.

Also, if you’re being examined, they tell you to take deep breaths, as if they know that anything going up is going to be painful. If sex is supposed to be pleasurable and enjoyable, why would doctors tell you to brace for impact, so to speak?

Lastly, women often scream during sex. It’s often said they’re screaming out of pleasure and not pain. But there are a lot of things I find extremely pleasurable, but I don’t scream while I do them.

Is it just one of those things that is painful but we’re conditioned into believing the pain is actually pleasure and I must have inconsistent pain tolerance and I am making a big deal out of this?

  • danhab99@programming.dev
    21·
    10 hours ago

    As a bottom I can give you one rule: penetrative sex of any kind is not supposed to be painful.

    If it is then there’s usually a diagnosable problem to fix. It’s not always physical it can be really spiritual. I struggle with bottoming usually because I need to like the person I’m with enough to relax, it’s called being demi-sexual.

    I feel like tops of any sexuality don’t really grok how intense of an experience it is to let someone into your own body such that when they’re in they don’t know how to respect what’s in there. Sometimes it does get so intense that it comes out of your voice, sometimes for me at least it gets too intense and I’m not sure if it feels good or bad so I need my top to slow down and let me figure out how things got rearranged.

    Lastly, porn recorded by total nobodys on a webcam or iPhone is just barely grazing the boundary of reality. So if you’re not vocal, you don’t scream, then you just don’t like that just not you.