I have changed my work teams twice now and happened twice now. First I just thought it was one toxic guy who picked up on me and had a knack on finding bully targets. Then, I have changed teams away from this dude and I felt I was surrounded by sane people this time but it happened again. It starts with one person making fun of me and others start to pick it up.

I’m not sure what it is that I’m giving away that I attract bullies so easily. I often put a smile and not make any rude jokes with coworkers. Maybe that’s the reason why?

I’ve observed one more pattern is that they act nice and normal when they’re alone with me but suddenly when we’re in a group, they start behaving in a snarky fashion towards me and find every opportunity to make fun of me. They often steal my ideas & jokes and pose them as their own too, I’m not bothered with it through as long as it doesn’t benefit them in work.

I’m not an idiot either at work that makes them think I’d be an easy target. I often do my job very well and stay up with every metric. They don’t seem to like it or try to downplay me whenever I’m in a spotlight.

I’ll be changing companies soon and I want to try to cut down on any behaviours that make me look like the doormat that I am. Any tips on how to make others respect me more? Thanks.

  • HobbitFoot @thelemmy.club
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    19 hours ago

    Friendly ribbing and trying to establish dominance are two different things. I usually take someone “friendly ribbing” me as an opportunity to do the same right back. You can usually tell rather quickly if they’re just doing it for fun or there is an ulterior motive.

    • Rhynoplaz@lemmy.world
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      14 hours ago

      For some people it’s not that easy to recognize. Maybe OP has difficulty with social cues. I have no idea, but it could explain why they don’t understand why it keeps happening.