The US very soon:
“The hour’s top story, Dear Leader has blessed the nation with things. That’s the news, now SPORTS!”
OMG, we as a society need to go back to that instead of filling a 24 hour news cycle with pundits and endless opinons.
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“Marxist-linuxist”
That’s magnificent 🫡
“Urgent” is not enough, please include BREAKING and SLAMS in your headline please.
You joke, but there are news “articles” that are just a bunch of quotes of what people are saying about a topic on Reddit or Twitter that read very similarly to what you commented.
while it’s not newsworthy, keeping track of that shit is important. i just wouldn’t think people are too lazy to go look for themselves, but then i think how lazy i am. i got a microwave hot pad that’s been sitting in the microwave so long i gotta microwave it again
I upvoted. May I have my paycheck now, please?
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marxist-linuxist is crazy accurate i love it
community, massively upvoted the post.
Not by nearly enough yet, keep upvoting!!!
“Ejaculated”
The weirdest thing about reading lovecraft was hitting phrases “they ejaculated into the queriest of orgies right there on the poop”
And also stop broadcasting every minor crime that happens in the world. People are way too paranoid now days.
more or less they found out using culture war BS(yes it has been going on since reagans time, like celebrity news, SPorts was useful against them from class war issues. so they dialed it to 1000, and adding copaganda, militaryproganda to that end. ragebait is very effective. plus “whitewashing white people” in media.
“Nothing happened today” isn’t a sign of a slow news day, it’s a sign of institutional decay. Literally people unwilling or unable to do their jobs.
Modern hustle culture has it’s own problems, but suggesting we should be applauding a national broadcaster just doing Ferris Beuller’s Day Off? Come on.
that’s a stupid question
That wasn’t a question, though.
edit: just in case i wooshed you in the first one, i was referencing this:
Fwiw, some of us got the (not even all that) deep cut, and liked it:-).
I hoped so, but if my jokes contain negativity I worry.
Admiral Patrick definitely approves (look at his profile pic:-P
So apparently there was some news very relevant to the British Empire
The Chittagong armoury raid occurred when Indian revolutionaries Surya Sen raided an armoury in the Bengal province of British India, seizing it and setting it on fire. Martial law was proclaimed and troops were called out to quell the uprising.
Real “nothing to see here, move along” moment
Forgot the part where it was Good Friday and that’s why they did that
No news is good friday news
In Mexico we have an urban legend: in October the 2nd of 1968, an anchor man started the evening news with the phrase “Hoy fue un día soleado” (Today was sunny day).
During June 2006, days before the controversial presidential election of 2006, 84-year-old Echeverría was charged with genocide in connection with the massacre. He was placed under house arrest pending trial. In early July of that year (after the presidential elections), he was cleared of genocide charges, as the judge found that Echeverría could not be put on trial because the statute of limitations had expired.
Of all the crimes, it really feels like genocide shouldn’t have a statute of limitations
nah. there should be valid reasons to prevent the limit from tolling, like it doesn’t proceed against folk who are immune to prosecution due to office, but if you wait too long then sucks. victims are also owed timeliness
The best day on this planet.
[Ice Cube has entered the chat]
Lucky for us that scientists have since discovered so many new sources of news to keep us busy.
Fox News furiously writing down notes
